Why has the forum come to a snail's pace?

[SteveLW]

I think the discouragement related to feedback is a good one, BL. I do think for some reasons posters are drawn to certain sitches and not to others. I know for me I don't really understand the dynamics related to same-sex relationships. And I also have been less active in most WAH/WH sitches. But even within the broad categories, there seems to be a big differential in which sitches get lost of feedback and which do not. Obviously, I do not think it is a personal thing since none of us know each other personally.

I also have gotten the sense that when someone does try to step and and be a little more active, some posters have shamed them about it. Whether it is the frequency of their responses, or not liking the content of their feedback, or maybe just not liking the poster's world view. This is why I typically do not respond to other posters in a giving feedback to the OP of the thread. The poster is asking for feedback and perspective, not for two posters to debate the techniques and the responses being given. Most of the posters that come here looking for feedback can rightfully discern what is best for their situation. So even if two different responders give two very different takes on the OP's situation, the OP can take all of that with a grain of salt, and determine the best path forward for themselves. I do think over time the board has become a little more confrontational in that regard.

I am not MWD. I am not an expert, I don't pretend to be one. I am just a guy that has been through two sitches in my MR, and am willing to share learnings and experience from those sitches. I think it has has helped some, and others maybe not so much (as evidenced by a recent newcomer telling me to get lost!). But BL I try to help those that especially do not seem to be getting much response, if with nothing else some support and encouragement.

job, I do like your comments. I think maybe the 2x4s should be a little softer, maybe use a pool noodle instead of a 2x4! LOL I know in my case good, stiff 2x4s is exactly what I needed, but that is not everyone's cup of tea.