DonH: Ha. This is my honest zone. I’m not entirely worried about what people think, and I try to leave it all here. But truth seems to be that 40 year old fit successful men are in short supply.
LH: I agree with you. I’ll be transparent. I have a friend about a year ahead in the process that has talked to me about where it starts and how it changes. We’ll see what happens.
And I do agree, I need to begin to work on really being fine being alone. I haven’t really started that work. Same time, I’ve surrounded myself with people that care and love me. Spring is on its way, which opens up a world of activities. I may be alone, but I’m not alone in nature. I’ll be hiking, biking, running and kayaking very soon. ————— Today I had to spend some time with the STBX at one of my daughters sporting events. I was there first with my son and she came and sat by us. I didn’t say anything to her because I didn’t have anything to say. After 20 minutes she went to talk to Someone else. It was a 5 hour tournament so on and off I saw her all morning. I didn’t say much to her.
At another point she came up to my son and I and we went to grab lunch in the car. Another time him and I went to get coffee. At one point she was standing next to me, just the two of us, and she went to sit down. I felt like I should follow her but then thought, No, I don’t want to sit next to her. For some reason I felt a little guilty, but whatever.
Then My son was standing next to me and she texted him that she had an open seat next to her. So he turned to me and said “Mom asked me to come sit next to her.” I wasn’t sure what to do with that. He walked over there and then I felt really bad because I felt like I was tearing the kids in two, making them choose (even though I didn’t do it).
Anyhow, at a break I went and sat next to them so my son wouldn’t feel pulled in a direction. I’ll have to continue to think through those interactions for the kids, but I really don’t want to be around her. She’s a very negative influence in my life.
