Your checklist is spot on. And yes H felt unloved because he currently could not or cannot love. He is in crisis. Something from deep within consumes him.
My XW told me she thought she was going crazy, felt so unhappy, and took her final chance at true happiness. Lol. She is blind and blissfully ignorant to her own denial.
Originally Posted by cardinal
This feeling of confidence may be fleeting too...
Yes, it will flit, if not reinforced.
So, make that knowledge and confidence a deep held belief.
A conviction, a value, is self-renewing. It almost effortlessly reinforces feelings and thoughts. Imagine how you will feel when you believe this new understanding you now have. And that is meant in the literal sense as well. Imagination is the first step to creation. You want to hold this as a truth, imagine it, and strengthen it.
You have a keen problem solving mind. It has being mulling over things and found understanding. Now you just got to believe your own thoughts. Allowing your thoughts to influence and alter your values is a slow process.
Understanding, compassion, empathy, forgiveness. The LBS journey, truly is a blessed opportunity, one which we never would have asked for.
You are doing amazing!
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
