Let me give you some more details and address some of the points above:
- a few months before I found the forum I consulted with 2 lawyers regarding my rights and obligations to my W and S6 in case we separated. Both attorneys assured me that if we end up in court she will not be able to take S6 to another state without my consent. Our separation, as well as his change of home, loss of friends, support network and a few other factors should be more than enough for a judge to rule in favour of our kid staying in his current environment.
- we do have an extra room that is used by guests staying at our house. I have not asked her to move there yet but will attempt to do so. She is also trying to rent another apartment/house for herself. It might be that OM is pressuring her to move out.
- I have complete control over finances, she has access to her own money/savings. At the moment both her previous job and my current job can not be done from home and we decided (before last summer's BD) that she will quit her job to stay home with S6 as he needs help with home schooling. She will pay for her trip to see OM either with her own savings or more likely he will pay for her. We currently pay for most of the bills 50%/50%.
- ever since BD I have been GAL-ing with my friends and S6 almost every weekend. I do like spending time outdoors so there have been plenty of hikes, beach/mountain visits, riding, surfing, theme parks, etc. Sometimes my WW would join, but that would be very rarely.
- Sandy has a very good question and she hit the nail on the head with it! Only two things have changed between us since the beginning of IHS. As I mentioned in my earlier post, we still sleep in the same bed, have meals together and we both do almost all of the household chores and helping S6 with school. The first change since we started the "separation" - we barely talk outside of S6 logistics. The second change would be the almost complete lack of sex and intimacy between us. After the first BD the intimacy actually intensified until the second BD. After the second BD the sex went down the drain. As I have noticed in some of the other sitches as well, my WW stopped dressing/undressing in front of me but rather in the other room or bathroom.
I really don't know where things will go from here. I know for myself that I definitely do not want to be with a person that is able so easily to throw away all trust and shared history together. On the other hand, I would prefer to keep my family intact but she will have to really change and humble herself and I don't see that one happening soon or at all. I am currently working on detachment but then again since we see each other every day and spend time with S6 together she and S6 are on my mind constantly.
