Little Gerda Goes Forward with Courage and Safety

[Gerda]

Girl power, May and Cardinal, you sweet things!

Giving up self doubt for Lent -- that is a good idea. I am not sure how to do that, it's so cellular! But it's a good thing to try/pray about.

It's always the fine line here between being open enough to get support and closed enough to keep some things on the down low.... So I am trying to be vague! But the big piece is finished and has had some interest, just didn't go all the way. I work in a few different artistic fields that require a lot of hustling and a thick skin, beyond the creation side. I guess I feel very confident in my vision but less confident about marketability. I teach in the same fields and have no trouble motivating others to create. Before H, I was on my way in more than one field and then I let everything go and forgot who I was. Now I get scared that it's too late to make something of myself artistically, but I am trying to start my next thing and not take the hustling too seriously. In one of my other fields, I have literally let things go for all of Covid, and I am trying to set something up at home to be able to get back into it and keep getting waylaid by not being handy enough or technical enough, so it's all kind of a perfect storm of feeling like a loser.

But that said, I do have a finished work that I know is good, so I just have to keep trying and not let rejection get me down. That is what I meant about getting a lot of courage from your support. I will check out the Lynda Barry though, and I will start making plans for our umbrella-drink weekend, 2022.

Now Cardinal, your turn. I know you have 15 minutes a day to write. If you don't, wake up 15 minutes earlier or go to bed later. Toni Morrison did it at night when the kids were asleep. The novel is to be found as it appears on the page, and it will appear surrounded by pages and pages of things you will toss once you see the actual novel appearing. I am sure you will start to see it this year if you do 15 minutes a day. What you are going through will feed the work, I speak from experience! XOXO