Also, hearing about coach re-attracting his X, I've thought about that a lot. My X was toxic to me. All my relationships in life are improving with her being gone. I'm dramatically more free and worry less about a lot of things. She did not bring out the best in me or support me. And with all that said I just can't understand this wanting I have to get things back when I know it was bad.
Because when you're married, your relationship is a source of stability in your life.
Your brain doesn't like this instability.
Because of this lack of control and the fear that comes with it, you desperately, desperately want to regain your feeling of control and stability.
If you see this in yourself, that you have lost your feeling of control, then you can come to the conclusion that this is what you need to deal with, not what your wife does or doesn't do.
