Drh2001,

I'm not Sandi, but tend to believe you're correct - many do feel bad about what they're doing because they know it's wrong and are hurting someone they cared about enough to marry and vowed to love, so they're trying to be "nice" about it (if that's at all possible).

Me:39 Ex-W:37
M:7 T: 9
S:6 D:3
BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20
OM1 affair ends: May '20
W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20
W files for D: Jul20
OM2 confirmed: 9/2020
Divorced: May '21