Happiness

[scout12]

Previous Thread:

Scout's Emancipation

Before he went away, X expressed interest in finalising the new parenting plan when he returned.

I'd already prepped the paperwork with my lawyer in January, but the hiccup over the birthday party made me hesitant to do anything that could trigger an outburst. He tends to arc up whenever he is a) contacted by my lawyer, or b) asked to commit to anything.

So with the party out of the way, I instructed my lawyer to send the paperwork this week. It details everything we agreed upon last year. Let's see if he is willing to sign a document that legally holds him accountable as a parent. We haven't had any response yet.

I've been rewatching Mad Men lately and this quote made me think. Emphasis mine.

“I don’t think I ever wanted to be the man who loves children,” Don tells Megan. He goes on:

"But from the moment they’re born that baby comes out and you act proud and excited and hand out cigars but you don’t feel anything. Especially if you had a difficult childhood. You want to love them, but you don’t. And the fact that you’re faking that feeling makes you wonder if your own father had the same problem."

Becoming a father was the downfall of X. And knowing what I know of his angry, distant father... maybe that's why.