I will commit to myself to stop all “feelings” and just deal with it.
That can be a dark alley, Steve. You say you've been down it twice--drinking, getting lost in online games. How else do you "stop" your feelings? When you move on, you will feel a lot. Anger, Bargaining, Depression. Those sound less abstract when you live them. A good thing about moving on, is there's an end in sight--Acceptance. Unlike the roller coaster you're on now with your kids, which could loop indefinitely.
