Well I've done quite a lot to move forward and I have good days and bad.... you see the bad...
As for the dog - sorry its not easy to turn my back on the puppy I raised and the puppy I'm bonded to. My entire office swooned over this dog the 4 days he was here.
I get it - its just a dog. But, lets say for a moment it's your 4yr old child "sorry, from this point forward its time for you to have another woman care for our child that's closet to your home". WTF...
I have admitted to my mistakes in recently being there "on call" for this puppy during his emergency health crisis and how it did set me back and that was 100% my own fault. I'm not blaming anyone here on this board that I picked at my own scab. I see how my emotions are still at risk when dealing with STBXH and puppy. But, puppy is my number one and I will have to figure out how not to get drawn back in and set back.
As for dating - I was giving an honest montage about my experience and I'm made fun of??? Really??? I'm just telling my experience as it is. I hear that I should not be dating... I'm starting to see that... I have a terrible time cancelling plans with anyone BUT, I stood up for myself and told the guy I'm staying home on Sunday. Then today another guy texts to inform me we have dinner reservations for X on Saturday... WTH... I never agreed to go out with him again.
I'm making some good new friends in the real world as best as possible given COVID.
This is my journey and completely imperfect for sure. I'm doing a lot of self work. I have a support group... again which is hard because I've gotten hit on in this support group... UGH... but I'm there doing the work.
You all are just getting a real honest version of a person who admits who she is and where she is at and loves herself inspite of imperfections, flaws and falling down... I get back up everyday.
