My Confusing MLC Navy W

[ovrrnbw]

I didn't want to leave her hanging because it's a crappy feeling. I told her I've had to recently rediscover my purpose. My views that I've based my rediscovery of self around stem from concepts and ideas that are sustainable, not a specific person or job or thing. I made it clear to her that my goals have nothing to do with her or the kids.. but they exist in such a way that whoever is in my life is part of those goals/dreams. I'll be doing this or that and living like this.. regardless of any other circumstances. Faith, personality, personal and professional goals, lifestyle choices, life experiences. I don't know if that makes sense.. but a lot of the discussions here have helped me to form my vision of my future.

I wouldn't share this kind of intimacy with someone who is in an active affair.

Over the last few nights, she has been caring for me because of the Lasik recovery. After I laid down with my eye shields and basically can't move, she has been pulling close. Yesterday, she said she feels like she lost her purpose.. she wasn't sure she had one. She talked about it being based on the kids and her job in the military keeping a roof over our heads and similar things.

I also wouldn't believe anything like this being positive. She isn't back.

Another discussion that seems to keep popping up is that she's a monster. She feels guilty. She messed up. She doesn't deserve to have someone care for her. She doesn't feel like she can be herself because she feels bad. I just try to reassure her. I don't know if this is wise but I remind her that I'm not perfect

She is using you to minimize her actions and you need to learn to validate.

There are some good positives going here, keep them going. I'm going to finish reading this later.