And we keep moving on.

[Irish M]

Hi Everyone

Gerda, nice hearing from you,

This dialogue is an amazing portrait of how people who don't have ears to hear can't hear

yes, its amazing what people what to hear. I'm sure they are aware ; they just don't have the tools to deal with it.
Sorry that your son pays the price of ignorance.

I think it helped me in other parts of my life though, as realizing it made me realize that I have always been tortured by the need to be understood, to explain myself, to be the good one.

totally agree with this. It took me a long time to finally let it go. NOt easy and sometimes I slip but I do come back from it faster now that in the beginning.

Hi Bttrfly xxhugsxx
Unbelievable about your XH. married. I presume your son had no clue either. My XW I think she is remarried not sure. Someone said the heard she got married on a row boat in the river lol. Not sure it counts.

I agree, so happy we didn't hold our breaths for them to come back to reality. Sad some stay stuck.

Dejavue, If your XMIL is in the picture you are lucky. If mine had shown some support for the girls at least I would have kept them involved. My XSIL is my oldest god mother to boot. Nada from her. Their loss because my girls are amazing.


HI Job,

Blood is thicker than water. way thicker. But my D's are Xmil blood too , I guess they don't see that.

I think as my girls get older; they will one day reach out to her. Maybe when they become mothers themselves. Who knows. Completely agree on the only talk to them if its rational one.


Hi Andrew,

Yes my XW never was the one to start a conversation to deal with something, Every argument we had it was silence from her. The next day she'd wake up like nothing ever happened. It was draining on me because I am a fixer. My girls thank god love to talk about everything. If something is bothering them we discuss and solve.

HI DnJ
I was surprised they played along with it. Especially XSil. she in the beginning told me she was happy the girls were with me. Seeing first hand the type of men XW was with. I guess time changed that thinking .
Yes, Hurt people do hurt others. Sad when one side knows what the other side should do. In her case i know if she'd start slow, open up to the girls, listen to them and accept the attacks. They could build from that.

Hi Nickwing
Sorry you are in this MLC circus.

I read your comments and yes, I should be cold and cut it off if I hear what I don't want to hear.

I was worried because it was out normal that XMIL or XSIL would try to reach me. I wasn't going to hang up.
I don't hate these people. They chose their own paths. Me hanging up is anger and I don't have any. Anymore at least. I am disappointed in them all. Curious to why they do what they do.

I'll will defend myself to the end. So, if they challenge me I won't just hang up.

More than 5 years into this . I have moved on.

If MIL would call me or write. I'd answer each and every time. I have nothing to hide, I did no wrong. If they ask me something I don’t want to do like force or trick the girls , I'll just say no with the reasons why.

Why should i hang up and ignore.

I trully hope XW figures it out. I want her to be in their lives if it is a healthy relationship.

you say she’s crazy and i agree she does have a mental illness. I could just say nothing to her remarks and hang up. My remarks probably are unheard.

Or I can stay the course. Stay consistent in my replies.

Trust me , I'm not going on a 3 day back and forth text and email battle with these touches. I state my point. I repeat what I have been saying all along and i go on with my day.

Nickwing, we will all do this it our own way. Sure, this site gives us input and suggestions. No 2 stories are the same even though we share a lot of similarities.

All I know is I sleep well, my girls are well and healthy. They are in college and are communacative on all levels.
I will always answer a call in a calm and rational manner. If the MLC circus decides one day to join into rational conversation then it's good. If XW, XMIL and XSIL want to avoid, blame and hate, it's their choice. I will respond with the same responses i've given for 5 years. Then walk away from that conversation with a smile.

have a great week, stay safe everyone