So my ex did tell me the next day. Little did I know they couldn’t find his uncles contact and he was confused so they did utilize me. It was my exFIL with the old old phone number . So my ex became a contact person and so did my ex’s aunt. He is having a really rough go, is still in high flow and will need rehab. I anticipate a long hospital stay.
Work is fine, I’ve been working a lot and I’m actually calling out of work tomorrow. I have lots of time and I am taking D and her friend to my dads for the weekend so I have no time to catch up on house stuff.
We got our annual performance review at work and my supervisor is fairly knew although we all knew her from working a different position. She gave me exceeds expectations and just praised me to death. That was nice. And it will give me top raise. Im pretty sure everyone got a glowing review, but I’ll take it.
I’m still in lots of pain in my right foot/ankle and will get getting another MRI Saturday. If I could have anything, it’s for this to be fixed so I can resume my activity and have a life.
I was reading on someone else’s thread and it got me thinking. My D will be 14 this year. I will not be trying to blend families or live with another man until she’s off to college. It’s another chapter to mourn in my life. She’s just too old for it to know and those years are too risky to try to Attempt such a big life change. If and when I ever do live with someone else, it will have been over 20 years since I have lived with another adult. I have no idea how you can go from 20 years of adulthood alone to cohabitating. M was my last chance at that. It makes me sad and scared .
I also read a lot on newcomers with these new divorcees about my age who want to enter the dating pool right out of the gate without dealing with their own stuff, and OMG, that’s what’s out there for me now. Men who can’t be alone and are still stuck on their ex wives. God help me.
My love life seems more and more hopeless day by day and that is difficult to deal with. Life has been pretty lonely. Come home, do house work, cook dinner, eat, and eat alone, go to bed. No one to talk about my day woth. No one to give me a shoulder rub, no one to have conversation with. And my friends are so distanced now with this pandemic. It’s literally no one out there.
My work friends/friends/ my expressly physical therapist said I’m invited to their wedding, her fiancé has a boat and she said I am definitely coming on it this summer, and we discussed some trips down the shore ( yes, Jersey talk) that should be fun. But I literally still feel like every day passes and I have nothing to look forward to.
But in good news, D13 has been better. I think she knew I was getting serious. Let’s see how long this lasts.
And my dog, well, I have him. Like I said, he really is my therapy dog . Even D13 said “ I wanted the dog so bad and you weren’t all for it and now he’s the best thing that ever happened to you” she’s right. I don’t even mind when he wakes me up at 2am, lol.
That’s it. I’m still in a lot of pain, still lonely, but atleast my daughter is nicer and my dad is too
