Hang in there mark. AS others have said, things will get better. And DBing gets easier as you work at it and times goes on. RIght now your brain is still trying to figure out what went wrong. It takes a while to rewire your brain to realize the whys aren't important. The "what I do from this moment forward" is what is important. People who are always looking back trying to figure out where the previous obstacle was will eventually trip over the next obstacle. Put the past behind you. You've already had the epiphany about the power of DB, so focus on DBIng. GAL. Self-improvements. Detachment. Focus your efforts there. Grandmothers, and other common people do not matter. We live in an interconnected world, so worrying about things you can't control won't help you. Focus on yourself, and what you need to do RIGHT now.

You've got this mark.

M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018