I never got angry at XW, but did go through some anger at just the general situation, and at God/ karma/ the universe for boning me over like that. If you don't process the anger it can pop up in unexpected ways, like going postal over someone cutting you off in traffic or something.
We have been stuffing emotions down forever, they end up in our subconscious, and find ways to escape. Us humans stuff down so many things and then they bubble up at the wrong time. Google "radical forgiveness".
"wheel of emotions" is great chart. Helping my children process all of their emotions was challenging. I gave them a safe place to express them.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712