Leaving it behind.

[97Hope]

If you want him to understand you have to be consistent for a long period of time.

My exw sort of does the same thing. We could be NC for weeks/months then the minute it is halted due to contact about the kids, she thinks it’s open season until I ignore three or four texts in a row.

THIS is exactly how it is!!! I was NC for 3 months. Completely. Then I was polite over an exchange of paperwork and he leapt in my lap.

You know it's a relief that I'm not alone in dealing with this! Yes. I'll work on being consistently consistent.

Steve85 - Ok, hear me out. This isn't an excuse, this is my project. My IC said to treat everyone like the cashier - and I did that for a week - at the next session we figured out the problem. Apparently it's not super great to know, not only the name of several cashiers - but their kids' names, favorite pass-times and pets. Apparently I get very close to dang near everyone and then I wear myself out. I think I'm "being nice" but it's really a boundary issue.

IC said "No wonder you are exhausted all the time!"

Somebody stop me! (I used to say that to myself when I was over-nice to the hot dog vendor.)

So this is a great point and I think I need to regroup and get back to basics. Hard to explain, but your comment reminded me of a major thing that I can work on. THANKS!!!

There is a waiter at a local restaurant and I was very nice a few times and now I can't even go back because he hangs out at my table and it gets awkward.

Onward and Upward!