Your posts yesterday might have just saved my life - let me explain. I have a tattoo over my heart with the words - LOVE, HOPE and FAITH. I've had it since I was 29 yo. My W and I were dating at the time. One day we were strolling down the street in the West Village, in NYC, after a dinner date. We passed a tattoo parlor and spontaneously decided to go in and each get our first tattoo's. I had a very difficult time choosing the tattoo I wanted and ultimately chose these words because I have always strived to live my life according to them. I have consistently tried to have them be the driving factor in all of my decisions. Seeing your name and reading your posts made me realize that I have strayed from this over the past few years. (Hope was even going to be my daughter's name if I ever got pregnant. Unfortunately that never came to be.) I somehow lost this driving force, somewhere along the way, despite the fact that the words are tattooed over my heart. Instead, I have allowed FEAR, PAIN and ANGER to guide me.
I am a firm believer that all of our lives are dictated by the choices that we make. Everyday we make conscious and unconscious choices that dictate the path our lives will follow. The majority of the time the choices are small and unconscious but there are times in our lives where we have to make massive conscious decisions that will forever alter the course of our lives. I am at one of those times. The choices that I make in the next few months will alter my life forever.
I have chosen to choose LOVE, HOPE and FAITH has my driving forces once again. I wrote the following at 5:30 AM this morning. I am choosing to share my choices with all of you so that you may hold me accountable when I stray.
CHOICES
Lesson 48 - A Course in Miracles - The presence of fear is a sure sign that you are trusting in your own strength. The awareness that there is nothing to fear shows that somewhere in your mind, though not necessarily in a place you recognize as yet, you have remembered God, and let His strength take the place of your weakness. The instant you are willing to do this there is indeed nothing to fear
I Choose to place my marriage in the hands of God
I Choose to release fear and anger because they eclipse Love
I Choose Love, Hope and Faith always
I Choose Love because - LOVE NEVER FAILS
I Choose to continue loving you because Love is not a noun it is a Verb, an action word. LOVE is a Choice
I Choose to forgive you
I Choose to forgive myself for past transgressions, present failures and future ones to come
I Choose to let you go
I Choose to respect your choices and decisions
I Choose to live without the walls because Love is daring at all times
