They celebrate their 10 th anniversary on April fools. I’ll say, it’s one thing to have your husband cheat and leave, but then have to witness the affair and her being a family with your child for the rest of your life, is like a lifelong punishment in many ways. Sometimes I feel like I must be a super horrible person to have to witness this for the rest of my life. And I guess I also feel my anger building because I think there is a chance he is a better person and a better partner now. Even my dad who has wanted to murder him says it. It’s what’s best for D13 for sure. But again, huge pills I have swallow and not choke on.
G, I understand why you would take it personal, but fight that thought!!! Him being a better person in his new R is not an indication of something wrong with you, it just shows his journey may be moving into him growing (maybe). And even then, you know better to look at FB as a way to judge things, FB really only shows the "perfect" parts of a R and rarely shows the true reality. Dating can be a [censored] show at times for everyone and you just don't see that broadcasted on the outside. Trust me on that, never use FB to judge something. Life works in strange ways, and rarely is it fair. I can relate to so many of the struggles you face, some of your stories you posted early on I ended up having very similar ones in same ways. Even the April fools days being your ex's anniversary. I was married to my ex on April 2nd and her fiancé (they will be married this year) divorced his ex-wife on the same day. Watching them "look" like this great family on the outside for the last 6 years can be difficult, but really remember things aren't always as they appear. Look, I get this [censored] [censored] and I know how much you want a healthy relationship, you absolutely deserve it. You will have it, its not going to be in the timing you want, but its out there waiting for you. So keep focusing on you and meeting your own needs until someone else can step in and meet some of them also.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
