Finally DBing and Accepting

[BL42]

I assume you are agreeing to pay her $1000 a month child support ?

You "may" want to review your options on this, based on her mentality.

From my personal experience and other posters here, WW doesnt just mean they cheat.. Their whole world goes sideways, including looking after their children.. I have banged on about you stepping up and being their rock - But it "may" get to the point when she finds OM8, OM9 etc and your children are in her way - Being their Rock, you will deal with it and ensure the children are cared for... - But how annoying would it be to working your backside off just to survive and feed the children, while paying her $1000 a month when you are the one providing food and clothe - while she spends the $1000 on nights away with OM11, more cosmetic surgery or a tattoo..

Just a heads up really - I made this exact mistake and my children see very little of the money i agreed to pay the WW - While she gets tagged on drunken nights out but cant afford to buy clothes apparently !

While maddening, this is unfortunately how western societies have set this up. Steve_, I know you have a lawyer, right? Just to make sure you get the best settlement possible.

Agreed. By all means retain a top attorney and ensure you're getting the best deal possible but it doesn't surprise me at all. Even though I'm caring for the kids much more than 50/50, my wife has gotten a tattoo and elective surgery, and I'm still paying her a good bit more than $1000/month and my attorney said that's the best deal (under the law) I'm gonna get in terms of child support. This is solely because they go to her house to sleep 50/50 (nights matter, not days) even though I'm with them as much if not more than her during the days even on her weeks. The courts won't change that based on things like nutrition, hygiene, affair partners staying over...etc. Unless they're a drug addict or abusing the kids, it's solely based on incomes. If you look at it the situation rationally it's completely unfair and doesn't make any sense, but that is the way the laws are written in many states. It is maddening, but it's also just money. The way I look at it is I'm just happy to spend more time with the kids, because if it was based on other factors than maybe W wouldn't be as keen on me seeing them before/after school and all day Fridays, and me having more time with them may become a battle.