I do feel blessed to have kept the house. It may have some memories in it, but it also just feels like home. The house she bought, which was more expensive, is about half the size but in a better location. I can't imagine how much worse I would feel if I didn't have my home.
The house was a big deal to me. I am so glad that that was one point that I was not willing to negotiate on. I may have done the whole begging and pleading thing, but me leaving the house was NEVER an option I offered to her. I didn't leave the house nor the master bedroom nor the bed. I told her I didn't care whether she slept next to me or in another bedroom or on the couch or outside, I wasn't leaving. I told her that if SHE was going to leave then I wouldn't stop her. Told her I would rather she stay and work on the M, but if leaving was what she wanted then I would support her decision. She later came back and said "why do I have to be the one to leave?" I told her because she was the one breaking up the marriage, not me. That was the last time she said anything about it. She was gone about a month later.
I'm an architect and have done a lot of work on the house, so it's more than just 4 walls to me. Plus it's full of family memories and despite the D I do still love those memories. It's my place of refuge, it's where my kids grew up, it's a very meaningful place. I've been there 23 years now. It was paid off before BD, unfortunately I had to take out a new loan on it to pay my XW for her half of it but I have zero regrets. Actually the value of it has gone up another 100k since the D so I made out pretty well as it turns out.
