Wayfarer, gosh everything you said makes so much sense. That part with your exh quitting cold turkey and telling everyone is EXACTLY like my ExH!!! He did it once few years back before we moved overseas. He actually stopped drinking for a year. And after he started drinking again, he’d constantly talk about how he was able do it cold turkey for a year. “I did it for a year! I could do it again if I wanted to!”....as if that was proof that he has the will to stop anytime.
I asked both S10&S12 whether they were nervous when they tried to wake up dad but dad would t wake up. They both said no, “why would I be nervous?” I said well if I were a child and I tried to wake up my parent and it’s not working, I’d be a little nervous. S10 had more of a reaction actually, he said, “He wasn’t even drinking, he didn’t open the wine that he bought.” (I didn’t mention the drinking at all when I asked the Q, but that day when I knocked on the door and the kids opened the door I was so flustered that I blurted out “is dad drunk??”)
Funny side note- did I mention that I’m going to work at the same company as ExH? It wasn’t intentional, but it’s a big company and a great opportunity so I decided to take it anyway. and I will be in the same building as him. Lol.
Today ExH called and asked me if I’m starting work on Monday. I said yes. And he said, “you know the company culture....upper management don’t really like people talking about their dirty laundry and whatever personal business at work. I haven’t really told anyone here at work, so I just want to see if we should get our stories straight.” I said, “if people ask me, I’m going to tell the truth. We are separated and finalizing the divorce.” Him: “okay yeah that’s one way to do it too...” I then told him I was busy and had to hang up. I could hear the cowardice in his voice. People ask me this too, “but you will be working in the same building as him!!” I usually say; “so what? I’ve got nothing to hide, nothing to fear.” He is really not on my list of worries anymore.
