Man Indy, I feel like i could have written a good bit of your post specifically 4-6. The extreme anxiety is the worst. I’m not sure that it’s illogical, there is something unsettling to the mind when your future is disrupted I such a way.
I was talking with a friend of mine who is a great guy and got divorced a year and a half ago; he said that he realizes that he had made his wife the center and purpose of his life. I know I did the same without a doubt. Everything I did for the last twenty years was with her in mind, trying to create the best life and best future for her. I wonder if that resonates with you?
I’m now struggling to come up with my purpose. I think if i can find a way to get focused on that, maybe the anxiety will go away. Some of the stuff I’ve seen in men going through this is interesting, there are a lot of us as women initiate 80% of divorces. Find a brotherhood of good men to hang with if you can. That’s another idea.
Each day is labor. My IC recommended journaling, not sure if it’s helping or not, but every night I answer the question “What was today like?” I think the idea is that it gets it out to help me sleep better.
Anyhow, I’ll try to catch up and keep up with you. Good luck brother.
