It’s gonna sting for a while and then you will start to feel stronger. And then another wave of pain will come. Rinse wash repeat. Feel all those feelings, Indy. Don’t run from them because you can deal with them now, or you can deal with them later.
And don’t worry about timelines, and beat yourself up for not meeting your internal deadlines. I’ve been 15 months NC with my ex and sometimes I can get caught up ruminating on her again.