She lost sexual attraction...

[Benji]

Thanks for the honest feedback Steve, I appreciate it.

You are right about moving my personal insecurities out of the MC. It is just that my IC is now “on a break” due to Covid, so I was thinking of using the opportunity. But it probably does not make sense to waste our valuable time in MC on this.

When it comes to your statement that OM is not my issue and that it is hers - I do agree. And if this is something that she doesn’t want to share with me, that’s fine, I can live with that as long as this does not become an ongoing thing while we’re in MC, which is really highly unlikely to happen anyway. But do you think I should not even raise this as a topic in our MC, to at least let the therapist be aware of a potential third-person who could be undermining our work? Or some skeletons in the closet that could be leading my W to a constant doubt? When my W told me that she does not want to talk about that with me, she did express the feeling of the importance, and that she might want to share it with our therapist at least, in an individual session. So I was just thinking of supporting and raising that in the MC. Does that sound reasonable?

And do you think that the part regarding the idea of “sexual fulfillment with someone else” also comes under my own insecurities - or you think it is ok for me to bring this up in our MC and just make both my W and therapist aware that I would not want to consider this as a “solution” at any point and set my boundary there? If that is something my W is hoping for, I really want to be clear what my stance is.