Now today we exchange the kids, W was late as always.. I said goodbye to the kids
I'm curious.. why do you drop-off the kids? Most I know do it the other way. That way, if the other parent's late for pick-up, you and your kids are chilling in your house. Second, why do you tolerate lateness? My custody schedule has direct remedies, but others I know record tardies and seek relief if it's excessive.
Originally Posted by Pack19
W: I want to know everything that happens to my children when they are with you Me (here I interrupted her): You are talking to me in a disrespectful tone, I am leaving W: Don't behave like a child! Me: No, I am behaving like an adult and I will not listen to you if you speak to me like this. Wife did not change the tone. I turned around and left towards the car. As I moved away she shouted from the door "You are a son of a b*tch! I want to know everything related to my kids when they are with you" (All of this with both children there next to her)
Wow, I'm surprised and impressed. Is this Pack's thread?? Good job on setting and sticking to a boundary!
Originally Posted by Pack19
About sharing information on the kids. I don't want to use the children as a reason to contact her, but now she comes to me with all these shouts about knowing everything that concerns the kids when they are with me. My thoughts are, look W, I never wanted a D, I never wanted a broken family but if this is how our lives are going to be, a D with shared custody means just that, I will give you no explanations when they are with me as I will not ask for them when they are with you. Am I right in thinking this way?
Agreed! I inform my ex-wife about major dates--e.g., school conferences, performances, and promotions. She'd know instantly if the kids were seriously hurt. However, being divorced means you don't know what's happening to your kids every minute of every day. Both parents are competent adults. If they're not, well, you file reports with organizations like Child Protective Services to have your grievances addressed. My boss doesn't get to micro-manage me or receive hourly reports. I won't accept those from an ex. There's nothing vengeful in that for me. It just doesn't sound helpful for the kids or like a groove I'd enjoy.
