You are correct, Steve, she wasn’t a “friend” at all. I do think that the double betrayal is sooooo deeply painful for anyone tho. For years, I saw her (or spoke with her, texted her, etc) several times a week. We had dinner with our families every Friday night and took family vacations. We cared for one another’s children and they trusted us like aunts/ uncles. Our “friendship” was a very big part of my day to day life. I shared things with this woman about my own marriage ....
So to find out my H was having an A with her was beyond hurtful, it was also confusing and humiliating! It was my own history being rewritten before my eyes. I Also lost an additional person I thought was a friend and we need those people for support when our M falls apart. It was so raw and complicated and I started to question everything I thought I knew about myself and my relationships with people around me. My Hs A wasn’t an invisible person I could choose to ignore.
I’m not sure if Oceangrl had a similar experience but I do imagine it was hard and confusing.
Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
