Hey Blu thanks for stopping over on my thread I really appreciate it. As far as the civil discourse goes I would strongly suggest picking up a copy of Difficult Conversations by Stone, Patton and Heen. I picked it up for business related training but I discovered the techniques have been helpful with communicating with my H and the teens in my house. It's geared for both personal and professional communication. It lays out how to handle these conversations in a step by step manner which the way I'm wired I appreciate. It also accounts for variables. Some of the case studies are a little dated but the techniques are worthwhile.
FWIW I don't think choosing to spend the rest of your life with any human is ever going to be rainbows and sunshine. Humans are complex, flawed, creatures of habit, that also love to try to predict the future. Any one who says their long time R is rainbows and sunshine at all times is full of it.
