We ALL engage in passive/aggressive behavior at times. Some times, it is even the right thing to do.
Example. I have a brother that is always in need of money. Over the years, I have given him about 60 grand. The last few years, he wouldn't directly ask me for the money, and I wouldn't offer it when he was in "trouble". I wanted him to ask me directly so that I could tell him why the answer would be no.
He drained my mother dry of funds until the day she died. Most of her money came from me. I never cut her off to get to him, that would NOT have been right, and would have been controlling, but the day she died, his flow of free money ended. In this case, giving him what he wants is the wrong thing to do.
The point is that P/A is the right thing to do on occasion. I can think of any number of times when such behavior is the right thing to do with a child.
I love upfront and direct confrontations, BUT, there are many ways to communicate. If your spouse is playing the P/A game with you, maybe it would be wise to directly site an example and ask why.
All the best, -NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
