I completely agree about the Mrs Roper thing. I personally could live the rest of my life without a reminder of the fact that, to him, I appear desperate and demanding while he smirks his way through life never needing my touch.
The having to be sexy thing..I don't really like it either. To be truthful, I want the fact that I am an attractive lady to be enough for him. I want it to drive him crazy by just BEING. I sometimes resent the fact that I also have to DO. However, it is no different than me saying that I expect him to step up to the plate sexually and maintain the frequency that I prefer. He is entitled to his preferences, just as I am entitled to mine. I think where you might be running into problems today is the thought of, I am going to do all this work and thinking and he will still do NOTHING. And that might happen. Who knows..
I told my H the other night that he will no longer be able to rely on my anger as a guage of how well (or unwell, lol) he is doing as a lover. I think that he gives what he thinks is acceptable and then sits back and waits to see if it makes me mad or not. Well, this has worked in the past but it is tiresome and draining for me. So he will no longer have this cushion to fall back on. I have been happy and cheerful to him, all the while maintaining my stance that he let me down for almost two weeks. (f*cking sleep issues got in the way AGAIN) Since then I have felt empowered and as if I took back some of the power that I had given him and am forcing him to rely on himself to know what to do and when. I will no longer be guiding him and prodding him with a cattle poker (my anger) to do the right thing.
I know all of this is elementary PM stuff, but hey I haven't read the book in two years~
