Quote: In addition, I think that while your H is saying that he wants more overt action, his idea of overt and seductive might be totally different than yours. To him, seduction might be talking to him, whispering in his ear, crawling across the bed towards him...as opposed to the more scary (to him) versions where you are asking for pretty technical sex moves or masturbating in front of him as a form of seduction.
What you are saying makes sense but it hasn't been proven true in my experience. My husband has made it clear that any sort of timid approach by me is not going to work for him. He hates it, if for instance, I just come up to him in my flannel pajamas and say "Do you want to cuddle" and my most successful moves have been blatant ones like saying "Do you want me to mix up some gin and tonics and pop in a porn movie" or stripping to the waist and licking my own nipples(I got a lot of mileage out of that one).
Quote: They don't think like HD men because we don't TREAT them like hd men!
So true! But what's the solution? Act fake LD? Hard to do and in my experience counter-productive. Constantly stroke his ego? I already do this to the extent I can remain truthful. Maybe our LDHs have to pull themselves up by their bootstraps (self-confront) and tell themselves that doing their best to be the lovers we need is good enough.Not even trying is NOT! We can't screw it on any tighter for them, they have to do it themselves and only then can they come to appreciate their "favorite sex maniacs".
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
