I can't remember the exact wording, but this meme keeps coming up on my FB feed, and it's about trauma survivors declining help and how that's part of the trauma. You survived a lot of loss and trauma by being the "tough" one and you've recognized now that you need to ask for and RECEIVE help.
I wonder if an ACOA group might be helpful to you - not that alcohol was the primary issue with your parents, but the issues YOU have from being raised by them are similar to the issues of adult children of alcoholics. You might find some useful fellowship there. People who understand your pain in a deep way.
