What's New Today pt2

[Gerda]

I second DnJ's questions. What judge signed off on this? It sounds very messy and not at all satisfactory as a final divorce decree. The whole point of the divorce is to settle all these questions.

I also second what DnJ said about following the agreement but with an addendum -- GET YOUR FINANCES SEPARATED FROM THIS MAN ASAP. Why would you want to talk to him about money or share anything with him? Fly, Canbird, Fly!!!!!

(And remember, I say that as someone who does not believe in divorce and encourages standing staunchly! But this is the finances, you gotta get clear of that so you can build a good life no matter what happens.)

Without knowing any of the details -- it sounds like you most definitely would qualify for alimony on top of child support.

I would suggesting taking the papers to three lawyers, as if you are vetting them to see if you would hire them. It's a consultation to get their take and how they would approach this.

Alternatively, do a web search for women's justice centers near you. You need expert advice.

I am quite sharp on business matters and somewhat sharp on division of property so if you want to give more details, I could try to give you better advice.

My advice without knowing anything is that you immediately form an LLC that will be your rent collection entity. Do it as a single member LLC with you as the only member. All rents go into that account and all building maintenance expenses are paid from it. Build a history for that LLC. Do it fast, now, Dec 1 start date, so you can move all your books from 2020 into your books for this LLC.

I am still embroiled in divorce and joint ownership. So what I do with my LLC is that the LLC pays 75% of all rents to me and H. It goes into my joint account with H (he never accesses this and has no ability to understand anything about money except his delusion that I am stealing it). 25% stays in the company account to pay repairs and other expenses plus sales tax, etc. The 75% going into joint account all goes to mortgage. Right now it's not covering even a big fraction of mortgage but I am in forbearance too. But I am paying the interest at minimum so my debt numbers don't go up on my credit score; I want to be able to buy him out as soon as I can refinance.

Then you will have a history for your LLC and you can apply to buy him out by having your LLC buy the property. The total the LLC will have to pay is just whatever you owe him. A good deal!

Your rental income -- it's half yours and half his, but it's not the entire rents, some of that as I said above is going through your company along with expenses. When you do your taxes, you claim half the income that does hit your account and he must claim the other half. Likewise you each can claim half the mortgage interest. And as soon as possible, you buy him out and this is all yours to claim, via your business. Remember, you are building equity in a joint property. You have to get credit for that elsewhere if he is not contributing an equal amount to equity.

Child support is based on his income and should be done through the state. No discussion, no negotiation. The percentage the state requires is tied to his income and you don't have to check it, they will do that. You can also petition the family court for child support. This is the one thing the state is good at. Though I am remembering now that maybe you don't live in the US so maybe this isn't the case where you are, I always confuse your story with a few of the other "sophomores" here! : )

You can be creative with solutions to get something equitable and cut all ties and give him some relief. He is pissed about your expenses but he's not totally wrong. It should be quantifiable, how you are getting paid spousal support by what numbers, even if it's via equity in the property as a lump sum. Everything should be quantifiable, you take this thing worth this much, he takes this thing worth the same. The only thing is that you get to have a place to live, even if you end up by offering a slow transfer -- e.g., you buy him out fully by 2025, and you have a staggered schedule of how that gets paid out. I can be more specific if you can.

That's Gerda's suggestion page just after a Thanksgiving meal -- e.g., possibly turkey coma influenced.