Detachment is proceeding. Had another great GAL day with my boys and their grandparents, taking them for long drives and getting ice cream and visiting some local landmarks. It was rainy, but we found a pocket of sunshine and chased it for a good 30 miles - just to put a smile on my boys’ faces. It was a good day .
I’ve been focusing on becoming more aware of my body thru yoga and emotional awareness, seeing where emotions are stored in the body and learning which parts I’ve cut off from myself thru constant stress. Lots of walks, exercise, weightlifting, etc. I’m kicking ass at work, and keeping my home office very clean. It feels good. Started and completed a few house repairs and have more on the list.
As to the advice, the state of my wife is coming into focus but by bit. I found a bottle of bourbon that is alarmingly empty that I didn’t buy, along with a bunch of listerine stashed around the house. Now, this may seem alarmist - it’s one bottle of booze - but there are two problems. One, she has a history of substance abuse - she went nearly suicidal with marijuana around when we first got together, had a drinking and cutting problem in high school, and had a suicidal event three years ago where she took a bunch of my sleep meds and drank a bunch of alcohol and I came home to her unconscious on the floor - with my 1 year old running around. Two, it’s not just the alcohol which concerns me - it’s the sneaking. I know her, this tells me she’s in a dark place and sinking rather than swimming.
It explains why she’s been passing out on the couch for the last month or so.
As mentioned, I know I sound overly-jumpy. She’s a grown woman and it’s a bottle of scotch for gods sake. Well, I don’t care. I know my wife, and this is a bad sign. Each time this has surfaced in our relationship it has only gone to a bad place - to my knowledge it does not tend to right itself.
I would like to proceed carefully, and I could use the advice and wisdom of those on the board. Thanks
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