There are many LBS here that are divorced and seem jaded against cheaters and for good reason considering the pain they inflict. I do have a question for former WWs and LBS that have R after EAs/PAs. How long did it take between the WW/WAS initiating NC and moving through A withdrawal until a firm commitment was made to R?
I am not D'd. My W had an EA not a PA. Yet I am still jaded against cheaters. Especially, MULTIPLE OFFENDERS!! Your W has 3 OM. Likely on the prowl for OM #4 (or at least just another "right opportunity" away from a #4). And yet you give us a list like this:
"1. Not loving me - check 2. Moving out - check 3. Having an affair - check, check, check"
And then this:
"I’m an optimist and see a third option where she gets over the past, forgives herself, and chooses to try again."
Here is my question for you curtis. Why is your self-esteem so low that you could let someone treat you this way for this long without finally saying "enough is enough" and taking decisive action to move your own life forward?!
And LH nailed it with your kids. I am about as anti-D as they come, but your children watching this for this long is going to have lasting effects on how they view relationships, and will potentially set them up for toxic, bad relationships in their own lives. So while you are holding on tight, hoping for her to magically wake up from her fog (insert a giant Steve85 eyeroll along with LH), the damage that is being done to your children, potentially irreversible, is concerning. At some point curtis you have to stop wanting what you want so badly, and think about them.
And spare me the "oh they don't know what is going on" speech. Kids are way more perceptive about this stuff then you could ever imagine.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
