Boy I’m a glutton for punishment. You don’t listen very well. He can’t see anything but the diabolical KK who is trying to suck in back into the miserable marriage.
What time and space have you gave him? You guys talk more then most married couples?
Right now he is super happy in his new relationship. That he has made clear. Who knows how he will feel 2-5 years down the road?
The real problem KK is you know you weren’t your best self and that eats away at you. You know you could’ve been more supportive, less controlling and more playful and it’s a bitter pill to swallow. I get it. But this pain you are going through is how you grow and how you make those changes permanent so you hopefully never experience this pain again.
I hear you.
Just a MAJOR Fing setback last night... carry over to this morning.
I know he can't "SEE" me right now. But, I'm still sufferring from not being "SEEN" right now. Who knows how he will feel tonight, next week, next month or next year. I get that.
I know that healing isn't linear and setbacks happen. I also accept that outside things happening right now are probably also triggering this setback.
You are 100% correct. ALL I CAN SEE is each and every time I was less than loving - sure I was tired, frustrated and grouchy but snapping at someone who is just trying to make it better is not being your best self. I miss being playful with him but I accpet that sometimes he was just mean - he was tired, stressed. That meanness hurt and I would behave less than nice just validating his meanness. The stupid part we both loved each until... until he just didn't.
Realize that I'm just rambling on today. This is my crutch... keeping it here and not screwing up LRT.
