I sort of get what you're saying, but disagree slightly. At my core, I'm a very friendly person. Most people would describe me as friendly. But as the separation and divorce process unfolds, it becomes harder and harder to be friendly. What happens, at least for me, is that you naturally go into defensive mode where you merely see things from your perspective and you cease to consider the other person's point of view. You naturally go from being best friends to adversaries...at least that's what happened to me and DH. And I think that's why so many people become angry and mean and lash out during divorce. What has helped me most is to really try and view things from DH's perspective and I'm even trying to see MIL's perspective. When I become firmly entrenched in my point of view and fail to see what others may be thinking/feeling, I feel attacked during this process and, instinctively, become "unfriendly."
