All of the expert advice I've read on talking to the kids says to keep the kids out of the details. "Mommy and daddy just do not love each other anymore." type of statements. Things that do not cast blame on either parent. Make it seem as mutual as you possibly can without lying.
Son: "Dad, is this what you want?" You: "I want what is best for everyone, including you kids and your mom."
Notice, didn't lie. Didn't say: "Nope, this is all on your mother!"
And trust me, the kids will know. They don't have to be specifically told. Kids are much more perceptive than you think they are. The truth always has a way of winning out.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
