New here-heartbroken and confused

[OnlyBent]

Hey Rusty, I've been following your thread, we seemed to have started posted about the same time. I love how honest and vulnerable you have shown yourself to be through your posts, you seem like a very valuable woman and you should treat yourself as thus. I hope that you get to an outcome that brings you joy and happiness, whatever that outcome may be.

With regard to your question about how to stop contacting, I found this really difficult at first, one of the hardest parts about this journey is that I no longer get to message or call my W every day to talk about whatever is happening in either of our days.

I found that being physically separated from my phone was a big help, keeping busy, and I found a close friend who was happy to hear my life updates that I would normally share with my W. Like anything, if you consistently build a habit it becomes sceond nature. If you've ever tried to start up running or going to the gym, the first days and weeks feel like hell and its a real battle to do it every day. But 3 months in and it feels harder to not stick to the habit than stick to it.

Hope that might be of use!