Side note, wherever you live sounds beautiful. Where I am, we barely see stars even at night. Lucky you.
You asked why I was not planning on telling him each time, (when there is an opening) well, I don’t want to appear to eager. It seems that in the past, I would have these little exchanges he would seem to think I was getting a little too close for comfort and shut it all down. Of course, that is my interpretation, but it makes sense.
Right now, he came home and went to the fridge. I mentioned there were leftovers and he declined and ate his sandwich he purchased the other day. The dogs were hanging around hoping something would get dropped and he asked me a question and I took that opening to tell him a story about the larger one, once I put her in a sweater, her reaction was to put her head down and look away from me. He smiled.
Once done, he went to his room. I do see this time, today, that he is making himself visible. I have been through this long enough to not expect anything and I definitely don’t expect this to be long.
But I will take it and extend that olive branch when I can.
In all of my introspection while sad this last week or so, I know I am able to forgive and move forward. I now know that. Will he know this and want it? Let’s hope. But either way, I like this version of me instead of angry me.
