I think I just have the feelings that I have been I different for finally screaming to be heard.
I am sad, I am so sad that this happened. I have been numb almost a year and a half and it is finally weighing on me. All that I thought could happen hasn’t happened, but I am not seeing a way back from him. Me, yes. I am willing to stand I am still in love and I want this to work.
I know that we need work, this isn’t a come home and all is well, but will this happen? Who knows. I now feel like bargaining with him ( I won’t) I feel like going into the bedroom when he’s there and climbing into bed asking what happened? I haven’t felt like doing that ever. His indifference to me is so hurtful.
Since he has traveled so much of our marriage, I was very confident and able to take care of things here because I had to. I treated all of this vacancy as a business trip. I guess this was my limit, because it hurts.
I know that I will be ok, I may be sad, but I’ll ultimately be ok. I just want him.
