Through the World Barefooted -- Gerda's LBS Guide

[Gerda]

Oooh, Gracie! Glad to see you stopping by! I am esp glad because I get to have Grace IRL!

Meanwhile -- I made it to my cabin. I had to rent a car and took an SUV into which I packed 50 subfloor panels, a roll of cotton canvas I bought at a fabric store for 6 bucks a yard and a whole bunch of salvage stuff I have been collecting in my city over the last month for various projects here. First time I have been without either child in... ever? I sang to whatever music I wanted on the radio and watched the trees get more and more orange and red and yellow as I headed north, watch the sun setting over an orchard, made it to place in the dark and took me like an hour to unload the car under moonlight and starlight. And the front porch was full of the foamboard to insulate the walls of the basement and the ceilings of the bedrooms.

This place was our wedding "gift" -- we asked people to contribute to the downpayment instead of a registry. I was thinking as I was walking back and forth from car with the panels in the beautiful fall air looking at the mountain in silhouette of moonlight about how it ended up being MINE, and how when we bought it, I didn't even really want it. H was unhappy at an earlier stage in our relationship and he wanted to get away from the city. We almost broke up actually and then he decided he would move to a nearby beach town and split his time between there and my place in the city. It was too expensive so he started looking in the mountains,and eventually his goal of escaping became our project to have together, and even part of our wedding, as we married nearby and closed just after the wedding, with the gifts completing the downpayment. I learned to love it here and now it's mine and I am even making money on it. He stopped doing anything here for years, now I am fixing things and making it even more viable as a business. Since Covid started, I was able to cover my mortgage and all my groceries with the rentals. It's another symbol of turning the wreck these MLCers make of our lives into something we can seed as our own flowering vine. They chose a new life path,and we tried so hard to stop them. I stood for seven years. Ultimately I was thrust onto a life path I didn't want. But now I feel like I am waking up and figuring out where to go from here. The pain of losing the path I planned doesn't go away but in my case it became so clear that I couldn't stand in the same way anymore. Now I am standing for my kids, grieving the life they didn't get, trying to plant some new seed in what seemed like barren ground.

Still trapped in divorce land but maybe one day that will finally be over too. I still pray for my H, but not for him to come back to me, only for him to find his way back to God.

Back to the task at hand -- I am gonna set up my new dehumidfier now but I noticed that the PVC drainpipe is still leaking onto the basement floor so I don't know if this is gonna throw a wrench (pun intended!) in my plans to put in the subfloor tomorrow. I hired a guy to come and help me with these projects so hopefully all will go well in phase one of Operation Insulation. Thanks for all the advice, DnJ! I will keep you posted.