Great post ovr! BL just yesterday I could, for the first time, really clearly see why my sitch happend. To begin with M/R was a SSM since our first child and W is probably HD. That combined with me being NG and her not being good at talking about her feelings makes for a perfect case of building resentment and losing respect over the years. It might take you a while but really do look to your core, your values and your behavior. Over time you will understand more and more.
SSM was an issue for me for quite awhile, I probably have a bit of NGS, and apparently W wasn't good at talking about her hurts and feelings...so guess resentment was building. Didn't realize it was anything to break up a marriage or family over though. Still not clear on the lack of respect - guess I'll gain better insight over time.
Originally Posted by Mumin
"people don't make positive changes until the pain of changing is less than the pain of staying the same." Holy sh0t That's strong! Also means my W will probably never change.
Mine either. But I'll work on myself. Thanks for reaching out, Mumin.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
