I understand what he is saying about God's light manifests differently in men and women.
What is making me uncomfortable is that the behaviors he's describing as normal are ones that I've grown up being taught (and believing) are not normal and need to be changed. I read what he's saying and find myself telling my husband that I can not be a single parent. That there is something in me that is lacking...that I CAN'T be a father to my son. (And that part, is new to me...but mostly ok. I was raised to be a superwoman, but this is one thing I'm happy to not have to do. ) That there is something truly special about a boy getting the message from his father that he is a force to be reckoned with...a MAN. And that as a mother, I can't give my son the same message and have it mean as much.
But, I was a tomboy growing up. I climbed trees, played with boys. Hated barbie dolls. "You mean that all you do is sit around putting different outfits on them? And that's fun?? Sounds boring to me." WANTED to be a boy cause they got to play sports...I hung out with a group of boys and we all played cops and robbers. Although, thinking back on it...I WAS always the damsel in distress in our games. I was absolutely angry when my eldest older brother told me that I could not walk around without a shirt on...wearing only wonderwomen underwear...all because I wasn't a boy. I was 4 at the time. In my mind, boys got to have ALL the fun. They got to cuss and spit and climb trees...and NOT have to wear dresses. Yuck.
Don't worry, I grew up and now delight in doing girly things too.
Husband and I had a long talk over dinner last night. I touched on some of the things I mentioned in my previous post. He said, absolutely, this is what being male is about. And he lit up and opened up to me. Seemed delighted and comfortable to talk to me about this. He told me that it wasn't about hurting the other person...just being powerful and strong.
I have no need to prove that I'm powerful and strong. I just don't want to be told that I can't do something because I'm not a boy.
So part of my difficulty in accepting this...is that IF this is normal behaviors for boys/men...then I have misjudged my husband and am guilty of immasculating him. AND that if Husband and I have a son..they are going to be off doing things that I'm going to be left out of.
I'm just trying to get my mind wrapped around this.
I know men and women are different...but this different? Really??
Just tell me straight cause I really want to know.
) That there is something truly special about a boy getting the message from his father that he is a force to be reckoned with...a MAN. And that as a mother, I can't give my son the same message and have it mean as much.
I was absolutely angry when my eldest older brother told me that I could not walk around without a shirt on...wearing only wonderwomen underwear...all because I wasn't a boy. I was 4 at the time. In my mind, boys got to have ALL the fun. 
They got to cuss and spit and climb trees...and NOT have to wear dresses. 
Seemed delighted and comfortable to talk to me about this. He told me that it wasn't about hurting the other person...just being powerful and strong.
