You have a hard fought toehold right now. Haven’t cried in two weeks. You are rebuilding and healing. And you recognize you are not ready for a day with H, celebrating a birthday or otherwise.
I know you feel kind of mixed up on this. That’s ok.
Celebrate your eldest child’s birthday and let H do whatever birthday celebration he will or won’t.
If H’s presence would not affect you so, like maybe next year, yes you could include Dad on the invitee list. Currently, this year, no, you need to remain dim.
If you were to really be considering inviting H, I’d ask eldest’s if they wanted Dad at their party. Mind you, their wishes need to be acknowledged then - yes or no. Again, this year, I wouldn’t ask eldest nor invite H.
Have the “Covid big” party. Pin the tail. Eat cake and ice cream. And enjoy the day.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
