She’s home, she says she wants to work on the marriage but at the same time she is lost and confused. She is on a completely different timeline to you. As my MC said of my reconciliation, H and I are on different trains, trying to get to the same destination. He’s a few stops behind me, he’ll get there when he gets there. Honestly, some days I feel like I’m on the express train and his stops at every GD station! You can’t make her go faster than she can go.
I’m 4.5 months into reconciliation - it’s tough. Two steps forward, one step back. My H was like your W...wanted to come back, we had a few weeks honeymoon period then he went back into the “don’t know what I want but I want to try”. Slowly slowly he is becoming more loving, more affectionate. Give it time.
Try not to over-analyse, or micro-analyse as that is killing you and she will feel that pressure. You have to take a step back. I know it’s hard, I know what the anxiety and insecurity feel like, but it’s really not that attractive to be insecure or mopey.
Read the Reconciliation and Piecing thread on this forum if you haven’t already. You will find it really useful.
M:49 H:49 T:20 M:18 D:16 D:14
EA: Feb 2019-May 2020 Separated: Mar-early Aug 2020 H asked to reconcile: Jun 2020 EA relapse: Oct/Nov 2020 Recon #2: since Nov 2020
