May, what if you did decide to stay put for 10 years, until both girls are moved out? Some people really do stay in the home together for the kids, family and home unit. I don’t think we can really judge that choice if it works for people. I know people that have done this — they have an unspoken agreement and there was no expectation of affection, romance or fidelity. In fact my childhood BFF parents are still together and are in their 70s. They have a nice companionship. They share so much in common. We believe they both had affairs but it was never discussed between them. Her mom has shared that with her in her adulthood. So I don’t think these arrangements are unheard of if the goal is to raise children in a home together. I do think both partners have to drop their expectations for romance/fidelity to zero. I know myself and I couldn’t do that and wouldn’t want that. But it might be something to consider. If anything for the first couple years. Because when you eliminate expectations, you also free yourself of the disappointments that follow.

Blu

Last edited by BluWave; 10/13/20 03:42 PM.
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela