After my wife left I had thought about the things I had let slide for me (not just in the marriage) and I decided to get fit again and started walking and swimming and I am still doing both on a regular basis, making a conscious effort to get more sleep and to eat healthier which again I continue to do. I wasn't much of a reader but started to read some non-fiction books which I am enjoying. I've paid a lot of the debt we had (around 95%) and have started saving and I have a 5 year plan for that.
I am not a shoulder to cry on when it comes to the OM and she knows that, we do not talk about him and what her current feelings for him are but she has mentioned that her feelings are mixed up and she is trying to work through them. At this point I honestly don't know if she is in contact with the OM she does leave her phone down now and again and I have the pin but it would likely be pointless to check it as the messages would probably be deleted anyway and its imessages so doesn't show up on phone bill.
Its true I am hyper vigilant right now and I do watch what she does and I need to learn to get that under control and not to focus so much on the small things. I guess with all of the crap she was saying the months she was away and now the backsliding its left me feeling as if she is really committed but at the same time she says if she wasn't she'd just move out again.
