Sometime happened earlier on and now i'm kinda feeling defeated on how i reacted.
It's her birthday today and the kids wanted to give her a present and a cake. Brought them out to the mall and gotten those. A small chocolate cake and some jewellery accessories where my girls chose them.
Fast forward back home. I had work calls immediately after dinner and while i was in the middle of the call, i heard my W screaming at my Ds. Apparently they weren't very cooperative in getting into shower and they were wasting soap. Crying ensues and slamming of furnitures.
And then my Ds came into my room which i asked them what happened. Heard their story and explained to them why mommy was angry and they should apologize. A few mins later, D4 came back and told me that mommy doesn't want to blow out the birthday candles and doesn't want to celebrate her birthday.
And that's why i kinda snapped. I walked over to her as she was blow-drying her hair and I told her in a firm voice," The kids picked the cake and the presents and really want to celebrate your birthday and i would appreciate..." I got cut off by her. She exclaimed, "can they wait? I'm busy. I didn't say I don't want to take out the cake."
I looked at my D4 and there she was, face so guilty because she might have told a lie because she wanted to eat the cake badly. I shook my head and walked away.
when i went back to my room i felt this sense of stupidity because i felt like i have made the situation worse because i confronted my W for something trivial all because my D4 lied.
We carried on with the cake cutting and the formalities after 10 minutes. The atmosphere was tense and she at one point mentioned not to take photos of it. I disregarded it and took a few with her and the kids only. I left myself out of the photo op.
I have this feeling that the whole situation could've gone better and i blew it because instead of being calm and find out more from my D4 about the issue, I went straight to the W and sort of gave her a piece of my mind.
Looks like my mr nice guy syndrome is back and the fear of causing the W to be angry is triggering some sort of guilty feelings. Is this normal? Or I'm just blowing things out of proportion?
M(36), W(36), D(6), D(4) M-7, T-8 Bomb Drop - Nov 28, 2019 W requested separation - Sep 30, 2020
