How am I going to do this? Should I do this?

[may22]

hi Mar,

So glad to be of help... and FWIW, a few more little thoughts (haha I can't help myself!!)

Self-care-- I feel like before all this happened I defined self-care as a spa day-- massage, facial, pedicure kind of thing. Now I'm able to take self-care in the smallest of doses-- take out instead of making dinner if I don't feel like it (extra points to get something I really love that my H doesn't care for because... I'm focusing on myself right now), reading a fluffy beach novel, a playlist of music I love on the stereo, an extra long shower, ten deep breaths with my eyes closed when I start to feel overwhelmed. I know that there are other things that really helped me out earlier in my sitch, like yoga, and for whatever reason right now I haven't been able to get myself to start practicing again. So for now I'm just focusing on the little things and that is OK.

A grief counselor told me once about using tactile comforts when you're really having a hard time-- looking for things that feel, smell, taste good and comforting to you. So when you say you're drinking a cup of tea, I imagine you wrapping your hands around a steaming mug, feeling the warmth in your hands, smelling the tea, sipping it, just concentrating all your senses on the tea. Wrapping yourself up in a fuzzy blanket. Buying your favorite flowers and smelling them. Anything small you can do to feed your soul when things are so crazy and difficult.

I'm so glad you got a bit more sleep last night. Hope it is the start of a trend!!

xx May