Thank for hammering me back to my senses Ovrr. My train of thoughts had derailed and this was just what I needed.
She's not my women anymore and I have to act accordingly.
And yes I'm GAL-ing more than ever. Heck, I'm doing even more things now than I was younger (i guess i have more disposable income too haha). Muay thai, engaged a personal trainer, going for excursions with the kids, cooking a hell lot more frequently, reading and hanging out with my buddies, etc, etc. Going to sign up for a boat license this month as well...
I'm also seeing a therapist once a month too to work on myself. And most of all, re-reading the plethora of valuable advice in this forum.
I think it has come to a point that my kids are so attached to me that my W felt dejected at time. Thus my assumption that she wants to "let me have the kids if she moves out".
I'm slowly and surely detaching and making myself happy instead of depending on my W. I've been mr nice guy for too long and I've lost myself. In fact, I'm actually leaning towards being grateful to my W for creating this saga that allowed me to understand how lousy as a person I was back then (fat, ignorant, didn't spend enough time with the kids, low self-esteem, etc).
It's a marathon, not a sprint.
M(36), W(36), D(6), D(4) M-7, T-8 Bomb Drop - Nov 28, 2019 W requested separation - Sep 30, 2020